"What are you clinging on to that you should just let go of, because God has SO much more to bless you with once you do?"
~The amazing, wonderful, super-smart... Dr. Phil (Whybrew)
Wednesday, September 23, 2009
Friday, September 18, 2009
John 15
I've mentioned my small group on here before, and I'd like to take this opportunity, once again, to say how much I love them! They are some of the most encouraging, hilarious, loving girls I have ever met. A few weeks ago we started meeting Thursdays mornings before school for a bible study. (Side-note... This should prove my extreme love and devotion toward my fellow group members, that I wake up at 5:30 once every week.) This past Thursday we read through John 15. As I began to read and take notes over this section of scripture, I realized it was going to take me at least twice as long as it normally would to get through it. I was writing down nearly every single verse and a note of what it meant to me off to the side. I read further and further and realized that it was probably pointless to just copy the entire section in my journal (which is what I was doing.) I couldn't believe how much good stuff was in this chapter. Now, I know that the whole bible is important but this particular part seemed to hit me in a different way than any other I have read. Some was encouraging, some was a wake up call.
Verse 2: "He cuts off any branch that nears no fruit." ---> Wake up call. Is God saying that every time my faith is stagnant, and every day that I don't feel like I'm doing all I need to be doing for him, he cuts me off?? Even if it's not that drastic, it still makes me constantly think about how I can "bear fruit."
Verse 2b "He prunes branches that do bear fruit." ---> This was really good for me to hear. I know that everything God does has a reason and purpose but sometimes it's hard to see. Like when he takes away things that have become comfortable in my life. Some of you might know about how God called my family out of our old church a year and a half ago, which was the worst yet best thing that has ever happened to me. (If you're curious about that, ask me! I love telling that story, because God changed my life through it all) He has also taken friendships away, and other things that at one time were very important to me. And though those were some of the hardest things I've ever had to go through, I can hold my head high and trust God, because I know he sees the bigger picture, even when I do not.
Verse 4:"No branch can bear fruit by itself." I can't do anything on my own. I have needed the support of so many people to bring me to where I am. If you think you can deal with a big thing in yor life all on your own, you can't. I've tried, and then I've failed, and had to come to others to guidance.
Verse 9: "As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you." I can't fathom this verse. I can't fathom the amount of love God has for me. But I know it's A LOT. Even after everything I have done, he loves me with a love greater than I will ever know.
Verse 13: "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." As I read this I thought of my small group. I thought about how much I love them, and how important they are to me. But then I thought if one of them were in great danger, or dieing... would I lay my life down for them? Give up everything that I have on this earth, so that they may live? When it comes down to it, my answer was... no. Someday, I hope that my love will grow so great, that my answer will be yes.
As hard as it is to believe, those are only a few of the verses I wrote down... No matter how many times I hear of God's love, it still takes me by storm. I am floored. All I can do is drop to me knees and worship my Father, because he is amazing.
He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
He loves us
Oh, how he loves us
Oh how he loves
Verse 2: "He cuts off any branch that nears no fruit." ---> Wake up call. Is God saying that every time my faith is stagnant, and every day that I don't feel like I'm doing all I need to be doing for him, he cuts me off?? Even if it's not that drastic, it still makes me constantly think about how I can "bear fruit."
Verse 2b "He prunes branches that do bear fruit." ---> This was really good for me to hear. I know that everything God does has a reason and purpose but sometimes it's hard to see. Like when he takes away things that have become comfortable in my life. Some of you might know about how God called my family out of our old church a year and a half ago, which was the worst yet best thing that has ever happened to me. (If you're curious about that, ask me! I love telling that story, because God changed my life through it all) He has also taken friendships away, and other things that at one time were very important to me. And though those were some of the hardest things I've ever had to go through, I can hold my head high and trust God, because I know he sees the bigger picture, even when I do not.
Verse 4:"No branch can bear fruit by itself." I can't do anything on my own. I have needed the support of so many people to bring me to where I am. If you think you can deal with a big thing in yor life all on your own, you can't. I've tried, and then I've failed, and had to come to others to guidance.
Verse 9: "As the Father has loved me, so I have loved you." I can't fathom this verse. I can't fathom the amount of love God has for me. But I know it's A LOT. Even after everything I have done, he loves me with a love greater than I will ever know.
Verse 13: "Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends." As I read this I thought of my small group. I thought about how much I love them, and how important they are to me. But then I thought if one of them were in great danger, or dieing... would I lay my life down for them? Give up everything that I have on this earth, so that they may live? When it comes down to it, my answer was... no. Someday, I hope that my love will grow so great, that my answer will be yes.
As hard as it is to believe, those are only a few of the verses I wrote down... No matter how many times I hear of God's love, it still takes me by storm. I am floored. All I can do is drop to me knees and worship my Father, because he is amazing.
He is jealous for me,
Loves like a hurricane, I am a tree,
Bending beneath the weight of his wind and mercy.
When all of a sudden,
I am unaware of these afflictions eclipsed by glory,
And I realise just how beautiful You are,
And how great Your affections are for me.
He loves us
Oh, how he loves us
Oh how he loves
Monday, September 14, 2009
Thursday, September 10, 2009
Camp Adventure is a wonderful place where......
Camp Beautiful happens.... OW OW OWWWWL!
Injury buddies happen... (Yeahhhh birdie on a perch, and buck-buck!!)
Strangers leave as best friends...
Tator-Tot toes happen...
3-2-1 BLOBBB happens...
Conquered fears happen...
Co-Co's happen...
Skit night happens... (Y-E, Y-E-L, Y-E-L-L, EVERYBODY YELL CAMP ADVENTURE, WOOOO!)
Cabin buddies happens...
Cooking out happens... (Please tell me you aren't trying to burn a potato chip...)
Jesus happens... big time
Sunday, September 6, 2009
"Small things done with great love will change the world."
I work at a place where I am constantly serving others. Asking them how they are, serving them food, making sure they have everything they need. And I love what I do. It's nice to know that I could be the difference between a good, and not so great day, for someone. So yesterday I went into work expecting to serve. And I did that, but God surprised me. An older couple came in and ordered a couple sandwiches and I took their food out to them outside to one of the tables. They sat and talked for nearly 45 minutes, and normally once you were done you just leave and I would go out and get their tray and plates. But the husband came in, handed me the tray and their trash and a 3 dollar tip (50% of their meal), and said, "Have a great day, God bless." It just struck me in a big way for some reason. I didn't put anything special on the sandwich, didn't stick an extra lemon in the iced tea, but he was so nice. Roughly 2 hours later we were about to close and I was bringing in furniture from outside and a friend of mine, Zach, that works a couple shops down was passing by on the way to get the mail. Bringing in chairs and tables is a little annoying but not terribly hard. So, just as he was passing, he stopped and said, "Hey, can I help you bring this stuff in?" He helped me fully knowing he was getting nothing out of it. I'm glad I went to work yesterday. God showed me the impact a small act of kindness can have on a person.
Monday, August 31, 2009
My Friend/Fake little sister, Danielle Allie.
There's a girl that I like a lot. Named Dani Allie. I think you know her. She's pretty awesome, she makes me food and hangs out with me even when my sister's not there.
We have fun times together. :)
We have fun times together. :)
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
"A thousand times I've failed, still your mercy remains..."
Thoughts on mess-ups, guilt, shame, and God's grace.
Most times I'd like to think I have stuff in my life under control. I'd like to think I can keep a pretty good, healthy balence with everything. But every once in a while, I slip up... sometimes I fall flat on my face, and others I just trip over myself a bit. But the bible says that either way, a small or big mess up, I automatically fail. Boom; game over.
"For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking it all." It is so easy to just read James 2:10 by itself and think, "Wow, God tells me that I'm a failure and there's pretty much no hope for me." Awesome. And for many years of my life I thought just that. Oh, I knew that God loved me and that he has forgiven me many-a-times. But I didn't really truly believe it in the intermost parts of my being. Because of that there has been a constant layering of more and more guilt in me. I didn't know how and I didnt want to let it go. The little or the big things. There have been some recent experiences in my life that have been a HUGE wake-up call to me that I need to be more aware of my thoughts and actions... I can't participate in a church service and sing "Take it all" when I really don't truly mean it. I can say that I give everything to God, but the truth is I'm holding on to my guilt with a tight squeeze. Because, number one, it makes me feel better. I'm not really sure why, but I guess if I feel bad about what I did and just keep clinging on to those awful feelings about stuff I do wrong, then I know it was wrong. If I just let it go, I can't feel bad about it anymore. The second reason why I keep my guilt close to me is that I hate to feel vulnerable, and I hate confrontation. If I were to let it go, I'd have to pull it out and deal with it. If I just keep it inside then it's tucked away, nice and neat so that no one else will ever have to know about it, and it would be just fine. And then I read this...
"Then I let it all out; I said, "I'll make a clean slate of my failures to God."
Suddenly the pressure was gone—my guilt dissolved, my sin disappeared." (Psalm 32:5) This helps me to visualize the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that in the end, letting go of pain and guilt I've carried around for so long, will turn out exponentially better for me. It's just going through the pain of having to deal with all the stuff I have done that scares me more than anything. God's grace is so much more than enough for me, and I'm just starting to realize the depth of that. "If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking..." In Mexico, my super awesome fanatstic small group :), talked a lot about trust in God. About how trust in God is something that comes with experience. The more hard times a person is faced with, the more their trust in God is stretched. I think it's the same with understanding God's unfailing love and grace. If you did everything right, and never messed up, (which is impossible) than you would never know how incredible the grace of God is. The fact that Jesus can hang, nailed to a piece of wood, blood pouring out of him, and say "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do" baffles me to no end. There's no way I will ever know how amazing, and how unconditional the love of my heavenly father is. My love is so uncredibly conditional, and my continual prayer is this...
God, forgive me for my mistakes, take my guilt and rid me of it. Help me to let it all go. I want to understand your never ending, unconditional grace and love towards me. "Take my life and let it be, EVERYTHING, all for you! Here I am, use me for your glory! In EVERYTHING I say and do, let my life honor you! Here I am, living for your glory!!"
Most times I'd like to think I have stuff in my life under control. I'd like to think I can keep a pretty good, healthy balence with everything. But every once in a while, I slip up... sometimes I fall flat on my face, and others I just trip over myself a bit. But the bible says that either way, a small or big mess up, I automatically fail. Boom; game over.
"For whoever keeps the whole law and yet stumbles at just one point is guilty of breaking it all." It is so easy to just read James 2:10 by itself and think, "Wow, God tells me that I'm a failure and there's pretty much no hope for me." Awesome. And for many years of my life I thought just that. Oh, I knew that God loved me and that he has forgiven me many-a-times. But I didn't really truly believe it in the intermost parts of my being. Because of that there has been a constant layering of more and more guilt in me. I didn't know how and I didnt want to let it go. The little or the big things. There have been some recent experiences in my life that have been a HUGE wake-up call to me that I need to be more aware of my thoughts and actions... I can't participate in a church service and sing "Take it all" when I really don't truly mean it. I can say that I give everything to God, but the truth is I'm holding on to my guilt with a tight squeeze. Because, number one, it makes me feel better. I'm not really sure why, but I guess if I feel bad about what I did and just keep clinging on to those awful feelings about stuff I do wrong, then I know it was wrong. If I just let it go, I can't feel bad about it anymore. The second reason why I keep my guilt close to me is that I hate to feel vulnerable, and I hate confrontation. If I were to let it go, I'd have to pull it out and deal with it. If I just keep it inside then it's tucked away, nice and neat so that no one else will ever have to know about it, and it would be just fine. And then I read this...
"Then I let it all out; I said, "I'll make a clean slate of my failures to God."
Suddenly the pressure was gone—my guilt dissolved, my sin disappeared." (Psalm 32:5) This helps me to visualize the light at the end of the tunnel. I know that in the end, letting go of pain and guilt I've carried around for so long, will turn out exponentially better for me. It's just going through the pain of having to deal with all the stuff I have done that scares me more than anything. God's grace is so much more than enough for me, and I'm just starting to realize the depth of that. "If grace is an ocean, we're all sinking..." In Mexico, my super awesome fanatstic small group :), talked a lot about trust in God. About how trust in God is something that comes with experience. The more hard times a person is faced with, the more their trust in God is stretched. I think it's the same with understanding God's unfailing love and grace. If you did everything right, and never messed up, (which is impossible) than you would never know how incredible the grace of God is. The fact that Jesus can hang, nailed to a piece of wood, blood pouring out of him, and say "Father, forgive them, for they know not what they do" baffles me to no end. There's no way I will ever know how amazing, and how unconditional the love of my heavenly father is. My love is so uncredibly conditional, and my continual prayer is this...
God, forgive me for my mistakes, take my guilt and rid me of it. Help me to let it all go. I want to understand your never ending, unconditional grace and love towards me. "Take my life and let it be, EVERYTHING, all for you! Here I am, use me for your glory! In EVERYTHING I say and do, let my life honor you! Here I am, living for your glory!!"
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